Mistakes Are Not Failures. They’re Part of the Process

Kaboom!

My wife and I immediately turned our heads and took in the scene. Two of my kids were completely covered in grape soda. So was much of the kitchen.

We didn’t need to ask what happened. Our friends, who we had been visiting for a few days, had one of those Sodastream machines. You know, the kind that uses carbon dioxide to make sparkling water.

Well, they had shown the kids how to use it, and they were doing pretty good…Until they had the idea to use grape juice instead of water.

The result? A carbonated grape explosion.

We were pretty upset. After all, if we’ve said it once, we’ve said it a thousand times:

Ask before you do something like that!!!

My emotions started to take over. I wanted to raise my voice, to give another stern lecture…

But then I stopped.

I remembered a lesson I had read recently, a six-word expression that resonated with me the second I saw it:

Mistakes are part of the process.

Whether or not you have kids, this expression is a useful framework. Viewing mistakes through this lens—whether addressing your own mistakes or those of others—allows you to:

  • Manage expectations
  • Use the difficulty
  • Follow the Rule of Reframing

Manage expectations

Mistakes are unavoidable, especially when you’re learning how to do something new. Recognizing that helps you not only to accept mistakes, but to expect them. This is a more realistic way of seeing the world, but it’s also something more.

Knowing “mistakes are part of the process” helps you build resilience and puts you in an excellent position to…

Use the difficulty

When you expect mistakes, this also puts you in the best position to plan to use those mistakes. After all, if “mistakes are part of the process,” exactly what process are we talking about?

The process of learning.

This is all part of…

The Rule of Reframing

In psychology, to “reframe” is to reimagine a problem by seeing it from a different perspective. Reminding yourself that “mistakes are part of the process” helps you to lessen the gravity of the situation, to see the bigger picture, and to turn negative into positive.

So, the next time you, a colleague, or a family member makes a big mistake, resist the urge to get frustrated or lose your patience. Instead, remind yourself:

Mistakes are part of the process.

By doing so, you’ll make sure to benefit from mistakes instead of simply repeating them. You’ll turn frustration into motivation—maybe even inspiration.

Best of all, there are no more failures—only more opportunities to learn.

Related articles

Get a quick glance of what our readers like the most

Mistakes Are Not Failures. They’re Part of the Process

Try to Understand: How to Show Empathy

Why You Should Never Compare Yourself to Others (and What to Do Instead)

How to Control Your Emotions: The Key to EQ Mastery

Set Your Boundaries

The Rule of Writing

How to Use Writing to Build Your Emotional Intelligence

Two people building a bridge, symbolizing bridging the perspective gap

The Perspective Gap: Why Showing Empathy Is Hard

two friends drinking coffee. One is showing empathy by listening.

Sympathy and Empathy: What’s the Difference?

One woman puts arm around another for comfort, showing all 3 types of empathy

What Is Empathy? The 3 Types of Empathy and How They Differ

Raise your EQ.
One week at a time.

Join a community of tens of thousands building their emotional intelligence with EQ Applied.

Join the weekly newsletter
You really make the concepts very easy to understand.
Kerttu
Amazing.
Juhan
You’ve helped me in so many ways.
Aksel
Really practical advice delivered in a simple form.
Kris
I feel like I just had a psychologist appointment. Thank you!
Patti
This is exactly what I needed at this point in my life.
Jason
Your EQ Rules of life have helped in more ways than I expected.
Mitch
The language you chose to explain EQ was simple and clear, which made it understandable.
Jenna
As a social worker I really found this to be helpful.
Jane
I have adult ADHD, so these tips are amazing for people like me, for time management.
Camille
I especially appreciate your heart centered approach.
Arlene
I enjoy every lesson.
Marion
Really helpful advice & lovely writing style, not to mention perfect timing.
Girvan
Brilliant.
Kathryn
I truly look forward to each email.
Jeff
The simplicity and reality of the rules fit in with any stage of life.
Susan
Loving your course. Wish I did this 30 years ago.
Bruce
Your emails are on my "open first" list. Excellent advice and insights.
CJ
So inspiring, encouraging, and educational.
Dare
I think this lesson has definitely made me a better person today.
Audrey
Powerful.
Craig
Truly life-changing!
Robert
Your emails are the basis for conversations I have with my son and nephew.
Gerald
Thanks for being real, legit, and genuine. Rare qualities.
Frank
I absolutely love this.
Scarlett
Sometimes you are better than my therapist.
Jennifer